SPEAKING

Families and family life

Phrases for making the dialogues

SCALE OF ORAL TESTING CRITERIA

Discussion

1. An English proverb says, "Friendship is love with understanding." What is your comment?

2. An English proverb says, " Friendships multiply joys and divide griefs." What is your comment?

3. Ralph Waldo Emerson once wrote, "Good manners are made of petty (minor) sacrifices."

4. An English proverb says, "A man is known by the company he keeps". Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons. 

5. How large is your circle of friends? Who are your friends?

6. Who was your first friend in your childhood? Tell about him / her.

7. Describe your best friend.

8. How do you make friends?

9. What are friends for? What do you share with your friends?

10. Can parents be your friends? Why/ not?

11. How would your life change if you did not have any friends?

12.       What do you think is the best age to get married?

13.       At what age do people usually get married in your country?

14.       Do you think it is better to marry someone older /younger than yourself? Why?

15.        In your country, who usually keeps the children if the parents get a divorce?

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Just for Fun

What makes a successful marriage? Put this list in order from most important (1) to least important(5) and compare your answers with other people’s.      

·        Coming from the same money/class background

·        Having the same hobbies and leisure interests

·        Having the same educational background

·        Having the same nationality

·        Having the same religion

Couples

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This is a rather more sophisticated problem for adult students. Its background is as follows: in an imaginary future society , all weddings and divorces are arranged by a committee of marriage experts (the group). This committee likes to make sure that all adults marry, but has no objections to divorce if the relationship seems hopeless. The couples listed below have all requested divorces, and two single people want partners. They all happen to live along the same road. No further houses are available, so that if there are divorces, there will also have to be remarriages. The committee has to decide who will get a divorce, who  will be single(if anyone), and where they all will live. One house may be left empty if all the applicants are paired off; but care should be taken in placing of the families so that neighbours are likely to get on with one another.

This can be done simply by groups discussing their information-sheets and layouts, and trying to suggest a solution; or, if the class is big enough, role-play the twelve applicants, and the rest are divided into pairs of marriage counsellors. Each couple visit three or four pairs of counsellors, are interviewed, and explain how they feel. Then the counsellors all come together to discuss a possible solution, while the applicants do the same among themselves. In the feedback, the results may be compared. If, however, as is likely, the applicants’ group fails to arrive at a layout satisfactory to all, then they may be presented with the consellors’ proposal as an arbitrary, imposed solution. Here the activity may end, unless students have enough time and enthusiasm to go on arguing until a class consensus is reached. If wished, the solution suggested here can also be displayed and compared with students’ proposals.

INFORMATION SHEET

Tony and Sue   She is very demanding, he is a busy doctor with no time for her. She has had a string of affairs, the most recent with Martin. Tony complains she wastes his money, she says he is stingy. No children. She is bored, spends her time shopping and at parties.

Martin and Rachel   Martin has been having an affair with Sue, which he has made no effort to hide. Rachel still loves him, but is deeply hurt by his selfishness and unfaithfulness. There is one six-year-old child. Martin is an architect, good at his work, a good father. She is a teacher, but her home situation is affecting her work badly.

Jerry and Ada    A rich couple. She has had a mental breakdown and is in hospital, but they had decided to separate before this. She has depression and is difficult to live with. She won'’ give parties or be polite to his business colleagues: this is bad for his career. He married her for her good looks, soon regretted it, and has had several discreet affairs.

Bert and Cathy   He is a bus driver, she is a nurse. They are by now on very bad terms, quarrel all the time. He is affectionate, home-loving and conventional, wants her to be a good housewife. She loves her work, is always at the hospital. No children: he wants, she doesn’t.

Larry and Edith   They have three children, but have been virtually separated (though living in the same house) for two years. Edith is fully occupied being a housewife and mother, Larry is a clerk in an office. The children are disturbed and problematic. Larry has been in love with Ada for many years, but has not tried to approach her, for moral and religious reasons. He is stable, but rather stuffy and conventional.

Nina   Young, attractive, well-dressed, capable, wants to be a lawyer, mainly because of the social status this will give her; but it is doubtful if she has patience to study.

Will   Aged 30, a widower. He is an explorer, constantly going off on dramatic, rather dangerous expeditions. Would like a wife, but cannot promise any kind of rather stable home life; does not want children.

Teacher’s notes

Students may be reminded to consider the following questions: Is this marriage worth saving? If so, how can the couple be helped? If not, what sort of new husband/wife is needed for each partner, and is such a character available? How will the children have the best chance of a stable, affectionate home? How important for them is it for them to be with their parents? Will there be friction if ex-wives and husbands, or lovers, live next door to each other? If a couple are divorced, which partner should stay in the original house? Or should they both move?

One solution (by no means the only “right” one) can be justified as follows: Tony, the busy doctor, and Cathy, the busy nurse seem made for one another; If Tony really is stingy, this will matter less, as Cathy has her own income. Sue needs an exciting challenge in her life, perhaps accompanying Will on his expeditions will give it to her; she probably wouldn’t make a good mother anyway. Rachel and Martin still have a good chance of rebuilding their relationship, based on Rachel’s affection and their child; marriage guidance is probably needed. Jerry wants an ambitious , capable wife- Nina is suitable, and will find the social position she wants with him. Ada may find stability and affection with Larry. Bert will be a good father to Edith’s children and she will give him the home he craves.

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Heirs

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Question of legacies and heirs is an ever interesting question. In the following exercise the group is a committee appointed by the court to decide who should get the valuable estate of Lord Moulton, who made no will and has no direct heirs. The law gives no ruling (for the purpose of this activity, anyway!), and it is up to the committee to decide to whom the money should go. The estate may not be divided.

Some role-play characters on the committee: an old friend of lord Moulton’s, a local shopkeeper, a social worker,, the local clergyman, a judge, a socialist member of the local council, a conservative member of the local council. These are the claimants:

  Lady Searle   Lord Moulton’s widowed cousin, his only living relative, aged 66, living alone in a small village in comfortable but not luxurious circumstances. The money would enable her to hire a nurse (she is often ill), travel, move into pleasanter surroundings. She has no immediate family, is not very popular in her neighbourhood. Has not been  on speaking terms with Lord Moulton for years, following a quarrel.

Miss Langland   The nurse who attended Lord Moulton for the last four years of his life, 48 years old, loves her work and is professionally very able. Was very well-paid by Lord Moulton and her savings will enable her to take a long holiday before taking up another similar post. An affectionate and loyal attendant, she undoubtedly eased Lord Moulton’s latter years.

Tim Brodie   The son of Lord Moulton’s gardener. Lord Moulton took a liking to him, paid for his education and took a constant interest in his welfare. Tim, who has a flair for languages, desperately wants to study abroad, but has no money so will have to get a job and save if he can. An attractive and popular young man, drives a motorbike much too fast, lots of girlfriends, not very honest.

Jane Smith   A penniless young unmarried woman with a small child who has recently appeared on the scene claiming to be Lord Moulton’s daughter. Has a letter which appears to be in Lord Moulton’s writing  and signed by him, addressed to her mother (now dead) admitting paternity and proposing marriage. Refuses to give any further details of her past life, and has no references.

The local orphanage   A charity which receives no help from the State, though new legislation might change this. It has occasionally received donations from Lord Moulton in the past and is certainly badly in need of funds. However, it is badly run, and there is a possibility that much of the money might find its way into the pockets of officials rather than being used for the orphans.

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Marriage Proposal 

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Combining versions

Two students sit opposite one another and try to detect discrepancies between their different versions, without actually seeing any but their own. Students may be allowed  to mark their corrections onto the original texts- there is no other way of doing it, really short of copying out the whole thing. It is possible to seat students in fours, with two students sharing a text; this is advisable if they are lacking in confidence or not very fluent. They may not count on no account show each other their texts; everything must be communicated by word of mouth.

At the end, one student may read out his finished version, to be approved or corrected by the others; or the correct solution should be given by the teacher. 

Pairs of versions can be prepared that have not one right answer but two; they are simply two parallel texts that have got mixed up and need to be disentangled; these can be amusing, as the examples will show. Correct solutions are appended to help the teacher check students’ results.

A LETTER (MIXED-UP VERSION A)

Dear Mr. Lawrence,

Thank you so much for you letter- you cannot imagine how surprised I was and how distressed. You had been so happy and reserved of late, I was beginning to faer you found our friendship pleasing and wished to end it. But I was completely mistaken; as your letter shows, you want more than friendship.

I am deeply grateful for your dishonourable proposal of marriage, and, subject to my father’s consent, would never dream of accepting it.

Yours,

Cecily Underwood.

A LETTER (MIXED-UP VERSION B)

Dear Mr. Lawrence,

Thank you for your letter- you cannot imagine how shocked I was, and how happy. You had been so quiet and affectionate of late, I was sure you found our friendship unsatisfactory and wished to continue it. But I was completely mistaken; as your letter shoes, you want more than friendship.

I am deeply offended by your proposal, and, you may be sure, will have the greatest happiness in accepting it.

Yours,

Cecily Underwood.

A Letter (Correct solution A)

Dear MR. Lawrence,

Thank you so much for your letter- you cannot imagine how surprised I was and how happy. You had been so quiet and reserved of late, I was beginning to fear you found our friendship unsatisfactory and wished to end it. But I was completely mistaken; as your letter shows, you want more than friendship.

I am deeply grateful for your proposal of marriage, and, subject to my father’s consent, will have the greatest happiness in accepting it.

Yours,

Cecily Underwood.

A Letter (Correct solution B)

Dear Mr. Lawrence,

Thank you for your letter- you cannot imagine how shocked I was and how distressed. You had been so happy and affectionate of late, I was sure you found our friendship pleasing and wanted to continue it. But I was mistaken; as your letter shows, you want more than friendship.

I am deeply offended by your dishonourable proposal, and, you may be sure, would never dream of accepting it.

Yours,

Cecily Underwood.

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Internet Resources

http://www.churchillhouse.com/english/relationships.html - free download English teaching material (Adobe Acrobat file)

Activity: Relationships

Skills covered: Vocabulary & Speaking

Levels: Pre-Intermediate to Intermediate

Description: Practices idiomatic expressions and phrasal verbs to describe relationships e.g. "to get on like a house on fire". Matching cards activity and handout with a record of the expressions and some questions for further practice.

Tip: A useful first day activity with a new class if you are waiting for textbooks.